Have you been trying to make a difficult decision lately and been unable to decide what to do? 

Maybe you’ve been thinking about changing careers and moving into a new industry? 

Maybe you’ve been toying with the idea to study again? 

Maybe you’ve been wanting to start your own business? 

Maybe you’ve been keen to go travelling or live abroad for a few months? 

You’ve been going over it again and again, coming up with pros and cons, weighing up the possible outcomes and assessing how realistic these are. You’ve asked friends and family what they think, tried to figure out what your intuition is telling you, but you just don’t know. 

So here you are, confused, stuck and unable to make up your mind.

First things first: being torn about a big decision is totally normal. It happens to the best of us, even that girl you spoke to the other day who seemed to have such clarity and have it all figured out. 

I also get that don’t want to stay in this limbo forever though and either drop it once and for all or go for it, so scroll down for some tried and tested ways to help you make up your mind. 

First: take the regret test

10 years from now, what would you regret not doing the most? 

Would you regret that you didn’t change careers? Would you feel disappointed that you didn’t study? Would you wish you had started your own business? Would you go back and tell yourself to get the hell out of here and travel or live abroad? 

Be really honest with yourself. 

If the answer is yes, then you know you need to go do them. That doesn’t mean you need to ditch whatever it is you’re doing now and take the leap. There are ways to make these changes more manageable and sustainable, I’ll write about that next time (make sure don’t miss it by subscribing to my emails here). 

Then: dip your toes in

Instead of making a full plunge, can you dip your toes in to see what it’s like?

Can you try it in a small way that doesn’t require you to leave your job, risk your savings or commit a lot of time and money to it? 

Doesn’t it make sense to try it out before you make a decision about it? Maybe you won’t like it as much as you thought you would or maybe it’s just not right for you, but you won’t know that until you try it.

So, if you want to move into a new industry, could you speak with a few people who’re already working in that industry and get a feeling for what it’s really like? 

If you want to study again, could you try out a foundations or introduction course on Coursera to see if you want to commit to a whole degree? 

If you want to start your own business, could you try the concept in a smaller way? Maybe you could do a car booth sale to sell your product or organise a one-off event to test out your idea or service and get valuable feedback. 

If you want to travel the world solo, take a mini solo weekend break somewhere nearby to see if you like travelling on your own. 

Stop thinking about it and go test it out. There’s always a way to dip your toes in and get a good feeling for what it’s really like, so go out there and do it! 

Still none the wiser? Don’t do anything.

Have you taken the Regret Test and dipped your toes in, but you’re still not sure if you should do it? 

Then don’t do anything. 

Just let the idea be for at least 3 months and see how you feel at the end of it. 

If you’re still thinking about it after 3 months, there’s a reason for it and you’re probably holding off because of something else. 

Perhaps you feel you need to have it all planned out before you make a first step. Or maybe you’re afraid of failing, you’re not sure if you have what it takes to succeed. Maybe you believe you’re too old or too far into your career to be changing direction. Maybe you’re worried that you run out of money and won’t be able to pay the bills or look after your family. Maybe you think you’ll look ridiculous for pursuing this, that your friends and family won’t understand or approve. 

Whatever it is, if you’re still thinking about it 3 months after you decided to do nothing with it, you owe it to yourself to figure out what’s holding you back and take steps to overcome this obstacle. 

These three steps really work, so give it a go and if it worked, don’t forget to share it with someone else who could use some help to make a difficult decision! 

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